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Our favorite sexologist is back! Dr. Celeste Holbrook is here again this week to answer some of your sex ed questions. We talk about everything from the basics of understanding your anatomy to the complicated feelings that may arise if you want to introduce sex toys into your partnered sex.

1. Where is the clitoris?

• First of all: the glans clitoris is what we typically think of when we think of a clitoris. It is located just above your urethra (where urine comes out). 

• It is a pea-sized gland. You sometimes have to pull back the skin of your labia.

• How to: get comfortable on your bed and start exploring your vulva with a mirror.

2. What are the different parts of genitalia for vulva owners?

• Reproduction: Vaginal canal, cervix, uterus, fallopian tubes, ovaries (all internal)

• Urination: Urethra (where your pee comes from)

• Pleasure: Clitoris (its only goal is to give you pleasure)

• Vulva vs Vagina

  • Vulva: everything external (lips, labia, clitoris)

  • Vagina: a canal that goes from your vaginal opening up to your cervix

3. Is heterosexual anal sex bad?

• Anal play can be very healthy and pleasureable.

• Three keys to anal play: relaxation, communication, lots of lubrication.

• It can feel great for anybody— no matter your sexuality.

4. How common is it for partners to orgasm at the same time?

• Basically only in the movies! It takes concentration to come. It takes communication and work.

• It ends up being more of a turn-taking situation.

• Reminder: you can have a beautiful sexual experience without having an orgasm. 

• “Most people do not say orgasm is their favorite part of sex.” - Dr. Celeste Holbrook

5. How do you approach a conversation about sex toys with a partner?

• Think of sex toys as adding to the connection rather than taking away from the connection.

• “Sex toys are only adding sensations to a partnership where there is already an exchange of vulnerability.” - Dr. Celeste Holbrook

6. Is it common to ask a guy to not come inside you? And what is a respectful way of doing that?

• You can absolutely ask your partner not to come inside you. You don’t ever have to do anything you don’t want to. 

Resources:

• Check out Dr. Celeste’s courses through The Velvet Box

• Listen to Sex Ed 101: Vibrators, Positions + Oral… OH MY! with Dr. Celeste Holbrook

• Listen to Sex Ed 101 with Dr. Celeste Holbrook

• Listen to Purity Culture, Painful Sex + Debunking Shame Narrative with Dr. Celeste Holbrook

• Listen to the Sex with Emily podcast here.

• Join Patreon at the $5/month level to get access to monthly group coaching calls. 

• Join Patreon at the $12/month level to get access to monthly book club Zooms.

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