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Every week on IG stories, I do “Mentor Mondays”. Recently, I answered a question about dating non-Christians and it just didn’t feel complete. Mainly because I only have 15 seconds on IG stories to answer very nuanced topics. So in this episode, I’ll be unpacking the much debated and talked about topic of Christians dating non-Christians (plus my own experience dating non-Christians).

Acknowledging the Disparity

• As a woman dating in New York City, it felt like being a contestant on The Bachelor where there was one guy for every fifty girls. Then add faith on top of that, and the number becomes even more dramatic.

• My pastor once told me, ‘Theologically, I can’t really tell you to go out and date a guy that’s not a Christian. But pastorally, I would encourage you to keep your heart open.’

My Experiences

• I have dated Christian men who treated me awfully and I have dated non-Christian men who treated me so well. 

• In dating non-Christian men, I let my community into my decision and thought processes along the way and it was so helpful.

The Bottom Line

• I want someone who loves Jesus, is a feminist, is liberal, is committed to growth, is playful. It started to feel like he didn’t exist until I met a guy last year who was all of those things. It didn’t work out with him, but it was a beautiful reminder that the man I am looking for exists. There are men out there.

Next week on the podcast, I’m talking about my choice to leave the church…go to Patreon.com/therefinedcollective and you can listen to it now (ad-free) and have access to a ton of other Patreon exclusive content.

Resources

• Keep up with my Mentor Monday series on Instagram here.

• Listen to next week’s episode early (and ad-free) here.

• Join Patreon at the $5/month level to get access to monthly group coaching calls. 

• Check out Rockefeller Center on IG at @rockefellercenter and Twitter at @rockcenternyc

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