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Are You Really OK? A Mental Health Check Up with Debra Fileta

Katherine Harris
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Unsure how to practically prioritize your mental health?

What are tangible ways you can check-in + gauge your current mental health?

Do you spiritually bypass your mental health struggles?

Sometimes we gaslight ourselves when it comes to spirituality + mental health. Here’s how...


Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor who specializes in dating, marriage, and relationship issues, as well as mental health disorders. She was on episode 97 of The Refined Collective. We talked about dating myths, and now she’s back for round two. She’s the author of True Love Dates, Choosing Marriage, and Love in Every Season! Her new book Are You Really OK? just released! Today, we’re talking about how to assess your own mental health and how to pursue help when it’s needed.

Mental Health 101

  • Emotional, spiritual, mental, and physical health all go hand-in-hand.

  • “Even good things cause an emotional reaction and stress. So the launch of a book— even though it’s an amazing experience— contributes to your stress… good things can lead to burnout.” - Debra



Emotional Health Check Up

  • We take physical health check ups seriously, but are we doing the same for our mental health?

  • How to have an emotional health check-in?

    • 1. Expressive writing: write down your emotions, no matter how messy. Studies show people who regularly do this experience fewer symptoms of stress.

  • “If we don’t take the time to stop and really process what is happening underneath, that pressure is going to build until it comes out in a way that we don’t have control over.” - Debra



Spiritual Health Check Up

  • 3 Spiritual Health Check-up Questions to Ask yourself::

    • 1. What people or experiences have shaped my view of God?

    • 2. What are some words that I’ve believed about God that aren’t actually based on truth?

    • 3. What characteristics of God— as revealed through his word— are most significant to me and my experience?




Mental Health Check Up

  • “Your mental health is not a sign of your character, it’s a sign of your chemistry” - Debra

  • Notice the patterns that contribute to your anxiety

    • Do you feel restless? Irritable? Soreness? Difficulty sleeping? Breathless?

  • Notice the patterns that contribute to your depression

    • Are you feeling sadness or apathy? Decreased pleasure in all the things you normally enjoy? An absent or uncontrollable appetite? Fatigue?

    • If you have any of these symptoms for two weeks, you can be diagnosed with depression. 



How to Say No

  • In an exclusive Patreon interview, Debra shares…

    • How to get to the root of why you feel the need to say “yes” always

    • How to set healthy boundaries in your life

  • Join Patreon and get access to this and dozens of other exclusive videos/interviews. Join here!




Resources





It is finally HERE! My book, Sexless in the City: A Sometimes Sassy, Sometimes Painful, Always Honest Look at Dating, Desire, and Sex is officially available online and in bookstores! If your copy arrives, make sure you post on social media and tag me! It makes my day to see it in your hands and I can’t wait for you to dive in.




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